Song Therapy

Song Therapy

I know we have something called movie therapy at church. I think it is wonderful how we use technology to inspire people and bring out the Word of God. Though I am not sure how many people are reading my blog (I think I should do a little marketing), I still continue to use this space to pour out my thoughts.

Been really down lately. Though I resolved to be happy in any way, I found it tougher these past few days. It has been really busy for me. I have poured out so much of my time for my work, which I am really grateful for, in the expense of my quiet times, fellowships, and prayers. I am glad though that I would get occasional calls and visits from disciples but then sometimes it would not be enough.

It is a tough struggle. Specially when you feel so alone. I feel tired and spent. But I realize that there will points in life that you just have to spend time with God. And I guess this is the part where it has been rather uncomfortable for me. Being alone means that I have no one else to talk to- to laugh with, talk with, share stories with. Being alone means, for that moment in time, God has to be enough. No one else but me and God.

Frankly, that is the challenge because for His own reasons, God is not a talkative God. Many times I have asked for signs, a signal, a message, a heavenly apparition to descend on to my bedroom without success. Perhaps, there is a part of me that wants to really make sure He is real.

I do not know why I still have this doubts about Him. Though I pray and talk to Him every now and then, there are times when I can't help but ask. Or maybe, side-consciously, I also want to provoke Him to make His presence felt.

I do feel that my approach is wrong. My maturity as a Christian is not yet to point that God requires of me. Which is of course, in the irony of it, requires that I become like a child. Full of innocence, full of trust, full of joyful wonder.

Despite my wrong approach, God does have a way of reaching out to me. A sister from the campus named Tong Wei sent a link for this song by Mercy Me titled Home Sick. And when I heard it-oh wow- the song hit "home." It basically sums up all that I felt up to this point. The longing for His companionship, His awesome presence, His love and Fatherly care. That is why the posts is titled Song Therapy. Another wonderful way we can use technology to encourage each other and inspire one another. Nothing is as soothing as a good song. Nothing so personal as lyrics that seem to give expression to how one feels.

So I want to share this song as well to all of you who reads my posts. Be it just one or two of you, I am okay with that. In reality I feel that what I am writing are not just blog posts but actual letters to God. So Father, if you are up there, I hope you are reading these "letters." I know one day I will see you but for now, I will live my life in a way that pleases you. I love you God. And I know you love me too.

Here is the song link and the lyrics.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=zvhrPMJe8LE&mode=related&search=

HOME SICK

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times

And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you

But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry

Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways

The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know

But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same

Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbyes

And in Christ, there is no end

So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have

To see you again

To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now